Big Brother: Kingdom Hearts
by Kirby-Star
Summary: Kingdom Hearts Characters are competing for 5 million munny in the game show Big Brother? Who will win? How will they face the challenges? FIND OUT! READ AND REVIEW
1. Day 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Big Brother. However if I did own them, it would end up looking a lot like this fic.

Authors Note: Hello there. I'm back for my third fic. I've stopped production of Kingdom Hearts High because it gets Hits and no reviews. THANKS FOR BREAKING MY FIC ASS! PHYCHO CRUSHA! REVIEW AND READ THIS FIC

Kills someone who read fic but didn't review

Big Brother: Kingdom Hearts

Chapter 1: Finding 3 Participants

In the Hotel Room That Never Was, The 13 Organization Members are plotting something, possibly something evil.

"Ok, said Xemnas, because the keybearers have destroyed the World That Never Was, we currently don't have enough money to buy a new Headquarters, so I've decided a way we can make money and possibly have fun at the same time."

Tifa walks in

"How is buying a hooker going to help us get money?" asked Xaldin

"Shut up! Yelled Tifa, I'm not a hooker. I'm the executive producer for Big Brother."

"You mean that show that humiliates people and forces them to the brink of insanity while living with people they hate?" Asked Larxene

"Yep that's the one said. Tifa cheerfully. Anyway Xemnas asked me to make a version for you guys. The Prize money is 5 Million Munny, where I got 5 million munny you ask, NONE OF YOUR GODDAMNED BUISNESS!"

Awkward silence followed by Demyx crying

"Anyway began Tifa again, the only problem is that I need 16 people to do a season, so either get 16 people or Get your ass out of my face!"

Tifa Leaves leaving the Organization stunned in silence.

"So, said Xemnas, any ideas who we can get?"

After 4 hours of watching TV and smoking…special…influential drugs…. They finally came to an idea

"I got it! Said a slightly high Vexen, we get Sora, Riku, and Kairi!

"They'll never agree to it." said Axel

"Hmm" pondered Xemnas

Meanwhile on Destiny Islands, Tidus and Wakka are planning ways to capture and sexually please Selphie on the Island… BUT THAT'S ANOTHER STORY

Riku, Sora, and Kairi, are on the Island shore talking

"Hey Sora, Said Riku, what would you do for a Klondike Bar?

"I'd probably join a game show with Organization 13, you?"

"I guess the same, you Kairi?"

"Dance while wearing a Panda Suit."

"Huh, said Sora, dance in panda suit, never thought of that before…"

Suddenly Axel, Demyx, and Roxas appear

"Hi, said Roxas, would you like to compete in a Big Brother game show?"

"No", said Sora

"Would you for a Klondike Bar?"

Two Klondike Bars appear in Roxas' hands

"We're in said Riku and Sora in unison!"

"We'll I'm not" said Kairi

Kairi is kidnapped by Axel, Roxas, and Demyx

Everyone standing outside the Big Brother Gates

"Hello everyone, I'll be your Host for this season, Yuffie, and it looks like we have our participants coming. For those of you that don't know what Big Brother is, it's a show where we have 16 people living together and competing for 5 million dollars. They will have to go through special challenges to stay, if you lose a challenge you are eliminated, also the participants can vote off someone. So how will it all turn out? Find out on this season of Big Brother: Kingdom Hearts!"

"So, now that everything's settles up lets go inside!"

Yuffie goes inside and sees Axel picking on Sora

"JESUS CHRIS, Yelled Axel, Those Feet, What size are those 18?

"S-s-s stop." said Sora Tearing.

"Anyway our participants for this Season are, Sora, Riku, Kairi, Xemnas, Xigbar, Xaldin, Lexaeus, Vexen, Zexion, Axel, Demyx, Larxene, Marluxia, Roxas, Luxord, and Saix

"Wow, this seems one sided said Sora, they'll all vote for us and win no matter what."

"Holy crap I just thought of that… said Yuffie running to Tifa's office. Tifa what do we—"

"All taken care of."

Earlier today

"Hello Organization 13, I'd just like to say that if you rig this in anyway eliminating Sora, Riku, and Kairi, you can all get a Phycho Crusha up your ass AND THAT'S A PROMISE!

Tifa Punches Demyx through a wall.

"AND THERES MORE WE'RE THAT CAME FROM!"

End Flashback

"Don't worry, said Yuffie, they won't rig it. Now Cid please close the door."

"No problem you youngster."

The door closes, leaving a possible hell inside the house

Day 1…

Everyone in The Courtyard

"So how's everything at Destiny Islands?" asked Demyx

"Good said Kairi. Tidus, Wakka, and Selphie are back at the Islands watching things for us.

At Destiny Islands

"HEY SELPHIE WE FOUND KAIRI'S DIARY" Yelled Tidus

Back at the Big Brother House

Yuffie appears out of nowhere

"Hello, its time for out first event, FALLING TETRIS BLOCKS OF DOOM!

"How do you play?" asked Sora

"IT'S EASY!"

Yuffie Dissapears

Suddenly, Tetris Blocks start falling out of the sky and the theme music of Tetris starts playing

All the participants are running around screaming. Imagine Huge Tetris blocks falling out of the sky with the Tetris music in the back and Kingdom Hearts Members running around screaming.

A Block hits Luxord

"Ahh… win… The 5 million…munny

Luxord passes out and Axel, Roxas, and Sora use his body as a shield from the Blocks

A Block hits Lexaeus

"I can still… play

Another Block hits Lexaeus

I…can…still

A Block the size of a Tree hits Lexaeus

The game ends and Yuffie reappears

"Well 2 participants have been eliminated and taken to the hospital… now for the vote round everyone vote for the person you want eliminated

Everyone votes

"And by unanimous decision Saix is eliminated!"

"WHAT! UNANIMOUS!" Yelled Saix staring at Organization 13

"Well, said Xemnas, we all said the first person we would eliminate was you so… uhh wish us luck!"

"Yea… AND GET THE HELL OUT!"

"Roxas Hadokens Saix out of the house"

"Wow, said Riku, I didn't know you could do a Hadoken."

End of Day 1


	2. Alliances

Disclaimer: Thanks to those who reviewed, and those who read. If you read and didn't review please do. I like hearing people's opinion about my work. Now read the FREAKING FIC NOW

PHYCHO CRUSHA

Big Brother: Kingdom Hearts

Chapter 2: Alliances

Day 2….

In the BB Kitchen, Larxene is doing Kairi's nails

"It's so great that another girl is competing. Said Kairi happily.

"Yep, said Larxene coolly. If me and you stick together we'll go all the way to the end and split the munny

Meanwhile, Xigbar was eavesdropping on the conversation.

"So… Larxene's planning to win and keep the munny for herself, well lets just see her beat XIGBAR! MUAHAHAHA

Larxene and Kairi heard Xigbar's entire speech. Larxene then did things to Xigbar so horrible that if I was to mention them the rating of this fanfic would be change to Adult.

In the pool area, Axel Demyx Sora, Roxas, Marluxia, and Xaldin are all relaxing.Unable to hear Xigbar's screams for help.

"Ahh the waters so great isn't it guys." Said Demyx cheerfully.

"Sure is said Marluxia. Hey guys why won't you come in?"

Marluxia looks at the rest of the participants, far away from the pool.

"Because, said Vexen, who had just arrived with Riku. I doubt anyone smart would want to be in the pool when Demyx is their."

"But I'm here!" Protested Marluxia

"Exactly my point. I wouldn't be surprised if Demyx drowned you on the spot and eliminate competition for the 5 Million munny."

"Hey, said Marluxia, remember we're gonna use that money to buy a new Headquarters not for out selfish desires."

"Right, I'm sure Larxene, or Demyx, or Xigbar, or, Hell even you won't use that money for yourself. Said Vexen sarcastically.

"Hey… I'm not greedy" said Demyx like a child.

"Yeah your not, said Vexen, you're an idiot. You'll use the money to buy candy or something."

"Well, said Demyx. I'll show you I'm not being competitive. Hey Xaldin come over here, lets have a pool party!"

"Um, no thanks said Xaldin reading a book entitled, How to control 7 lances."

"Come on said Demyx, getting out of the pool and nudging Xaldin to it. It'll be fun."

Xaldin took out all six lances and pointed them to Demyx.

"I'M NOT GETTING IN THE DAMN POOL"

"Aww." Demyx was about to give up when he thought of something.

Demyx quickly summoned 10 water clones. Six took the lances. And four held Xaldin.

"Hey! What the-Let me go!"

All four brought Xaldin to the pool and disappeared.

"HELP! HELP! I CANT SWIM! HELP"

"Aww, how cute, he's doing a dogpaddle" said Demyx smiling unaware of what was actually happening.

"HELP! HELP! HEL-GURGLE"

"Should we help him" asked Sora?

"No, said Axel, he just wants attention that's all."

Xaldin stops and goes to the bottom of the pool.

Awkward silence

"Told ya." Said Vexen smiling

10 minutes later, an ambulance pulls up taking Xaldin to the hospital to treat him

"So, said Yuffie, I guess now that the ambulance is gone and that Xaldins eliminated. We can move on to Game 2."

"Game 2! PAC-PAC MAYHAM

You must get all the dots before Pac man and the ghosts eat you. The game wont end until 2 people are eliminated. Or until someone gets 30 dots. Now BEGIN

The Participants are transported to a Pac Man stage

"Well this dosen't seem so hard. I can pass this in my sle- but Demyx was cut off as he turned blue and was eaten by Pac-Man.

"RUNNNN ITS PAC-MAN!" Screamed a horrified Sora

Everyone splits up to try and eat 30 dots.

"HAHA, All I have to do is Teleport and get the dots said Xigbar. 25, 26, 27, 28,

However Larxene tackled him and stole half his dots

"Well, said Sora, its up to me and my huge appetite to save us."

"WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA!" screamed Sora collecting as many dots as he could.

"HAHA said Larxene collecting as many dots as she could. 27, 28,"

But she shrieked in terror as she was surrounded by 3 ghosts and Pac-Man

"WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA!" SCREAMED PAC-MAN

The ghosts went after Larxene but she ate a Big Dot and everyone in the map turned blue.

"WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA!"

Larxene ate the ghosts. In fact she would have eaten the last dot and ended the game if she wasn't psychotic and tried to eat Pac-Man. However, as we all know when we eat a big dot in Pac-Man, it doesn't last forever, and Larxene soon realized that. As her WAKAS soon stopped and Pac-Man turned around at her and the Ghosts reappeared.

"Um, can we talk about this?" asked Larxene?

"No."

However Sora soon got the 30th dot and Ended the game before Larxene ended up in Pac-Man's stomach.

"THE GAME IS OVER!" Yelled Yuffie

"Now then for a vote round."

Everyone votes and Yuffie tallies it up.

"It seems theirs a tie between Vexen and Marluxia. I really don't know how to settle a tie, so settle it yourself.

Vexen Freezes Marluxia

"Their, Marluxia is unable to compete."

"Oh, then I guess Marluxia is eliminated."


	3. How Dreamy

Disclaimer: I forgot to do this so I'll say it two more times to make up for the last two chapters.

Kairi: Kirby-Star does not own Kingdom Hearts or Big Brother

Larxene: Kingdom Hearts and Big Brother are not owned by Kirby-Star

Pac-Man: WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA…… Kirby-Star does not Own Kingdom Hearts or Big Brother

Authors Note: I'm at a little mind block so while I prepare Chapter 4 and Game 3, here's chapter 3, How Dreamy

Big Brother: Kingdom Hearts

Chapter 3: How Dreamy

Day 3

It was a regular, ordinary day at the BB house. Larxene made brownies for everyone; Axel said fire sucks and started learning water. And Sora and Riku fell in love with each other… Ok I'm obviously kidding about all that, but wouldn't it be crazy if that did happen!

It was far from regular anyway, Yuffie had called everyone to the BB backyard for a house meeting that wasn't for an event!

"Hey! What's going on asked Xemnas to Vexen. Why'd Yuffie call us out here? And where is Yuffie?"

All the Participants we're gathered outside waiting for Yuffie when a Gummi Ship With 28 inch rims and other pimped out material landed in front of them and Tifa came out."

"Hello all! She said happily, Tifa won't be hosting because of an accident."

All the participants gasp.

"What's wrong with her?" asked Kairi

"She asked for a raise and I demoted her. Your new host is her."

Tifa points to a girl with,… well, just picture a Mary Sue with orange hair and white skin and medium height that anyone would fall in love with.

"Her name is Orange, she baked Brownies for you all!"

Orange starts distributing brownies to everyone of the participants.

"My god it's like an orgy in my mouth!" exclaimed Riku

"These are delicious." Said Kairi

But Roxas was suspicious of the girl and threw his brownie to Axel.

"I don't trust her, I think she's a Mary Sue."

"That was so hurtful said Orange tearing, I just wanted to make brownies to please you! YOUR SO HURTFUL ROXAS!"

Everyone, who loved the brownies, and I mean everyone loved the brownies agreed.

"YOU SUCK ROXAS!" Said Larxene

"Zexion you're my new best friend!" said Axel

"Roxas I'm demoting you!" Said Xemnas

"I'm already the lowest rank!" said Roxas

"Then Your Number 14!"

Everyone went back to eating; Roxas was glaring at Orange until Vexen fell out of his chair.

"Holy crap Orange poisoned Vexen!" Screamed Roxas

"No he's clearly sleeping." said Orange

"No, he's clearly dead!" explained Roxas

Everyone was looking at Vexen in silence

"You guys agree right?" asked Vexen?

"No we're just amazed at your stupitidy." Said Sora coolly

Everyone was laughing at Roxas, even Orange, who went up to Larxene and punched her heart out.

"JESUS CHRIST SHE JUST KILLED LARXENE!" Yelled Roxas

"Yeah, sure she did." Said Sora laughing, until Orange went up to him and made him choke on his Brownie.

"OH MY GOD!" Screamed a horrified Roxas.

Roxas ran up to Tifa

"Please Tifa! She's evil! You can't have a Mary Sue run the show! PLEASE!"

Roxas turns back and sees everyone dead.

"Your next. Said Orange, covered in blood.

"OH MY GOD!"

Roxas wakes up in his bed scared like crazy

"Thank god, it was just a dream." Said Roxas trying to calm down.

Roxas sees Axel walk into his room.

"Roxas! I WANT YOU!" Screamed Axel

Roxas lets out a huge scream and Axel wakes up screaming

"Damn that was scary."

Zexion wakes up in bed next to Axel.

"What's wrong honey?" asked Zexion

Axel lets out a huge scream and Zexion wakes up screaming.

"Holy crap! How the hell am I gonna get to sleep now?"

Larxene comes in Zexion's room.

"Go to sleep or I'm gonna rape you!"

Zexion goes to sleep and Larxene wakes up screaming

"I don't rape people, said Larxene sad."

Vexen wakes up next to Larxene

"Honey, I didn't marry you to wake up at night. Try to get back to sleep."

Larxene screams and Vexen wakes up screaming

"Damn! That was scary. Well time to get back to work."

Vexen walks test tubes and experiments.

"According to this said Vexen happily. The way to stop being a nobody and turn into a real person and save all the Nobodies is… Have Vexen have Sex with Marluxia! NOOOOO"

Marluxia wakes up screaming in the world that never was

"EWW. Maybe if I concentrate on my plants I can go back to sleep." Marluxia goes to his green house and sees Sora ruining it.

"YOUR NEXT!"

Marluxia screams and Sora wakes up with a grin on his face

"I always wanted to do that."

Kairi comes in.

"Sora, I'm pregnant, and the doctor says its your baby."

Sora screams and Kairi wakes up scared

"Eww, I did it with Sora."

Riku walks In.

"Kairi, I've decided to come out the closet."

"Your gay?"

"No, I'm EMO!"

Kairi screams and Riku wakes up mad

"For the last time I'm Not EMO!"

Xemnas comes in

"Lies! We were Emo Together!"

RIku screams and Xemnas wakes up mad.

"I'm not EMO!"

Xemnas goes out for a midnight stroll and sees Xigbar singing in a bikini.

"Itsy bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini! That she wore or the first tine today!"

"Xemnas faints and Xigbar wakes up Confused."

"Hey… I couldn't find my speedo that day when I went swimming…Its not my fault."

The Next day all the participants went to the BB backyard and see Tifa. They have rings under their eyes as they got no sleep.

Day 4

"Good Morning, Yuffie asked for a raise and got demoted. Say hi to Orange, your new Host. She made you all Brownies!"

"NOO! NOO! I will not fall for this again! Yelled Roxas! Screw you Orange!"

"Wow, said Tifa, untie your panties and chill. Besides don't worry, the demotion Yuffie got was to co-host."

"Yep, said Yufiie coming out of nowhere in ninja smoke. I have the same damn pay and a worse job. Now then, Lets start The day by telling you that today is Random Video Game Anime Celebrity Day!

Authors Note: Thanks for all the read and reviews people lets keep them coming please


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